One of the fun things about WordPress is that it tracks all sorts of interesting stats about blog traffic.  Among this information is a list of terms that have been typed into search engines that have resulted in hits to this blog.  Some of them are not surprising, and some are just plain odd. 

For instance, recently, someone came here after searching for “food for a good attitude”.  I’m not really sure what they were looking for, but one possibility is that they were researching foods that cause one to have a good attitude.  I know what gives me a good attitude:  coffee.  I also know what gives me a bad attitude: lack of coffee.  Pretty simple.  Other food items that give me good attitude are Godiva key lime truffles, bacon, mayonnaise, and Square Donuts.  Foods that give me a bad attitude are Hamburger Helper, beets, and diet salad dressing.  Or perhaps, the searcher was looking into methods of positive reinforcement involving rewarding good attitudes with food.  While I am highly motivated by food, I’m thinking it might be a dangerous proposition to try to withhold my coffee—especially if I’m already in a bad mood to begin with.  I’m pretty sure that would be counter-productive, and might even result in an episode of Rescue 911.

Another person got here by searching for “pic of a foob being giving out to people”.  I’m not sure that I understand what that means, but I’m picturing some sort of disaster response team handing out cases of bottled water and foobs to tsunami victims.  Maybe that’s where The Foob is—he’s decided to go on a mission trip.  Okay, probably not.

There was a search for “Dr Birhiray”.  No great shock there.  But it does make you wonder if that was Dr B googling himself to see if anybody was writing about him.  If so, I’m sure he was pleased to see all the nice things I’ve said about him, and the fact that I’ve never written about him turning into The Hulk like Dr Haerr. 

Finally, there was a search for “bald head sweating from cancer”.  I know all about having a bald head, sweating, and cancer, not to mention the three of those together.  In fact, I spent last summer completing an extensive research project on the topic of bald, sweaty, cancerness.  This was a total-immersion experience, where I actually lived as a bald, sweaty cancer girl for several months.  Amazing, I know.  But it’s really the only way to get a truly authentic experience. During this time, I became fluent in cancer-speak, with a special emphasis on the breast cancer dialect.  I also learned the ins and outs of cancer culture.  I hope to apply this experience in my work as an ambassador on behalf of the Cancer-American community.

5 Responses to “Searching”

  1. Ryan Says:

    SQUARE DONUTS!!!!!!!!!
    God I miss them and LOVE them. I would kill for a dozen right now, just plain glazed, please.

  2. The Moody Foodie Says:

    Prefer tractor tires myself. But plain glazed totally rock, too.

  3. TC Says:

    I think this must be the only blog on the whole World Wide Web where one can read the phrase, “bald, sweaty, cancerness.”

  4. The Moody Foodie Says:

    Apparently, you’re correct. Because, being the geek that I am, I googled “bald, sweaty cancerness” and indeed my blog was the only hit. As an interesting side note, Google asked me, “Did you mean: bald, sweaty, concerned”. And, again, being the geek that I am, I clicked that just to see what would happen. No matches. So I guess the only thing more unusual than someone writing about being bald, sweaty and cancery is someone being bald, sweaty and concerned.

  5. Rejection Revisited « In The Pink Says:

    […] murals across the minds of my readers like a blogging Michaelangelo with phrases such as “bald sweaty cancerness” and “Oh, look Edy’s has their limited edition breast cancer awareness Pink Ribbon Swirl […]

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