Relay & Rebellion

Last weekend was the 2008 Relay for Life.  Because I’m kind of a rebellious survivor, I neither wore a survivor shirt, nor participated in the survivor activities.  I tried that stuff last year, and man, it about sucked the life right out of me!  I mean, sheesh, you go to the survivor dinner and all anybody wants to talk to you about is cancer!  And they don’t want to talk about fun stuff like taking your foob mushroom hunting, either.  They’re all, “When were you diagnosed?” and when I told them I’d just been diagnosed a couple of months prior they were like, “Oh.”  You know, like I wasn’t a real survivor because I hadn’t done anything but had surgery so far.  And truth be told, that was kind of how I felt during last year’s survivor parade–like, I hadn’t really survived anything yet.  And so, it was just weird for me because it kind of felt like I was parading around like, “Woo hoo!  I’ve got the cancer!” 

Of course, now that I’ve done four surgeries, chemo, and rads, I’d say I qualify as a legitimate survivor.  But I still didn’t want to participate in the survivor activities, and have the life-sucking cancer conversations.  Not to mention that the survivor/caregiver dinner was at 4:30.  I just can’t be eating supper at 4:30 for at least another 20 years.

So, Hubster and I went out for Mexican at about 9:00.  That way I could skip the luminaria ceremony.  It weirds me out, too.  I know some folks really get into it, but as someone who has been fighting cancer, I have to say that I don’t really need to be reminded that cancer kills people.  To that end, a big candlelight ceremony where they read the names of everyone who has ever died of cancer is not a happy place for me.  Especially since luminaries can also be bought in honor of folks who are living—so they read those off, too.  It’s almost like, “These people died from cancer, and these people are in the queue.”  Or at least that’s how it makes me feel.  Like I said, plenty of people like that sort of thing.  More power to ‘em.  It’s just not for me.  I’ll be down at Lucio’s scarfing down chips & salsa.

You may recall the drama that unfolded during last year’s Relay involving the silent auction.  I’m happy to report that there were no such altercations this time.  Maybe that’s because in the aftermath of last year’s rumble, the committee changed the way the silent auction was run, and put it in a separate room where bid sheets could be monitored.  Or maybe it was because the purses this year were completely hideous, and I told Susie that the only person she’d be dukin’ with was me if she even thought about bidding on one of those for my benefit.  Either way, there was no big scene.

9 Responses to “Relay & Rebellion”

  1. Nicole Says:

    You make my day. “Woo hoo! I have the cancer!” I’m going to be giggling about that all day. That’s exactly how I feel when I keep getting invited to the pink marathons. Um. I’m in the middle of chemotherapy, you want me to walk HOW far?

  2. Garlic Sis Says:

    Oh, thought you’d enjoy this… I was at the hardware store today and they have pink ribbon flowers. It made me chuckle as I thought of your ode to pink ribbon ice cream.

  3. Theresa Says:

    I agree. I’m not much for sappy reminders. People know what a survivor really is when they witness an example; not so much a luminaria.

  4. The Moody Foodie Says:

    Nicole—You should really read my post from last October regarding all the pink ribbon stuff. I’m not one of those total pink ribbon haters, BUT I do get a little annoyed with seeing pink ribbons on everything imaginable.

    Garlic—What? No pink ribbon sawzall blades?

    Theresa—The sappy stuff just totally makes me squirm. Partly that’s because I try NOT to think about cancer any more than I have to. It’s also partly because I hate being put up on a pedestal—I haven’t done anything noteworthy. You know, I had the cancer…it’s not like I discovered a cure for it.

  5. Sarah S. Says:

    I totally agree. I got an invitaion in the mail the other day for a survivor’s dinner at the hopital were I am being treated. I thought it was wierd. First of all I am in the middle of chemo and the thought of sitting around talking to 15 year survivors just seems well wierd. I would be like “Hi I have cancer right now and I am bald look at me look at me!” I just want to kick cancer. I am with Nicole on the fact that I can barely walk to the car from my treatments. How am I goona do a 5K?

  6. The Moody Foodie Says:

    Yeah, the other thing is that treatment for BC is different than treatment for other kinds of cancer. It’s been my experience that a lot of folks think they know all about your treatment because they had some other kind of cancer. I had a lady freak out and tell me not to shave my head because I might not lose all my hair. I was like, “Thanks, but I’m doing dose-dense AC/T—I’m gonna lose my hair. Besides, I don’t want to lose, like, 75% of my hair and look like a dandylion.” But then again, the older ladies are a whole lot more hung up on the hair thing, too.

  7. Candy Says:

    Love. That. Post.


    I will never forget the pink ribbon ice cream in your old post.

  8. Sarah S. Says:

    A lot of people asked me why I shaved my hair off. They could not understand why I would do that. People kept asking me how I knew my hair would fall out. I think there are a lot of people out there that do not understand cancer treatment.

  9. The Moody Foodie Says:

    Candy, the ice cream is one of my favorites, too.

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